Written for the following prompts:
Verse First - Edit to elevate
One Single Impression - Farewell
Linking to:
Poetry Pantry #163
Verse First - Edit to elevate
Write a poem about something exceedingly ordinary, something completely mundane. Edit it to elevate it. Turn it into art. Choose your words carefully, using only those conveying your specific intent. Remove everything that doesn't serve you well.
So here's my poem for the prompt. Please leave your thoughts on my poem in the comments. Suggestions to make it better are welcome. Thanks.
Tweet
Verse First - Edit to elevate
One Single Impression - Farewell
Linking to:
Poetry Pantry #163
Verse First - Edit to elevate
Write a poem about something exceedingly ordinary, something completely mundane. Edit it to elevate it. Turn it into art. Choose your words carefully, using only those conveying your specific intent. Remove everything that doesn't serve you well.
So here's my poem for the prompt. Please leave your thoughts on my poem in the comments. Suggestions to make it better are welcome. Thanks.
The Paper
They say someday you'll be extinct
When paperless offices blossom
But you quietly smile and wink
Knowing these thoughts are like flotsam
It's environmentally friendly
Call the techno advocates
Paper and tree look on bemusedly
While air and landscape deteriorate
It's not the paper that's at fault
It's man's lack of caring
Tree and paper exist not apart
But enjoy each other's sharing
If man made paper from dying tree
Instead of destroying younglings
Our precious world would be fresh and free
And a friendly place for earthlings.
The circle of life applies to all
Not selectively; that's man's misunderstanding
Nature doesn't make us fall
It's our careless thought and handling
~x~
OSI - Farewell
and The Tree
The dying tree bade farewell
To the little ones around it
Use me, to man it cried out aloud
For I'm the one unfit
Don't leave me here to rot in pain
Set my spirit free to your benefit
Spare my young ones, let them grow
Dear Lord, let man that permit
~x~
Tweet
...how sad that in order to achieve a li'l innovation & progress one life or two has to be sacrificed... after all our granted favor from nature what have we all done in return? we seemed to almost achieve all the impossibles today but look at us... we are all in great trouble... we've improved the way of living but has shortened the posibility of survival for long... not possible that in the future the world will be ruled & operated dominantly by sentinels & / or such bionic types for the human race have already been cleared out of existence... too scary... ah, full of thoughts Suzy... and demands a lot of considerations.... still, i enjoyed it... thanks... smiles...
ReplyDeleteYes we need to look after our precious Earth. Thanks Kelvin.
Deleteso deep and heartfelt thoughts
ReplyDeleteThanks Vandana
DeleteThis is so interesting with a good message
ReplyDeleteSeriously most of the times paper is just used for the heck of it
Good one suzy
Thanks Afshan. So true - there is so much paper wastage.
DeleteClever poem Miss Suzy, now if they'd just leave my trees alone.
ReplyDeleteThanks Kelly. Yep, leave them alone people, leave them alone.
DeleteTouch of melancholy makes the message loud and clear. Classic poetry about the ultimate loss...So well penned, Suzy.
ReplyDeleteThanks Panchali. Glad you liked it.
DeleteYou have made such valid points. It does make sense to make paper from trees that are dying. We really should not touch the saplings. And we need, need, need trees for the life and breath of all of us.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mary. We sure do need nature to keep us going.
DeletePowerful, Suzy... at least they plant new trees to replace the ones they cut down. There's a paper mill not far from my town that stinks up the air if the wind is blowing a certain way.
ReplyDeleteThanks Laurie. I hope they do replace the ones they cut down. Still it's sad that trees are being destroyed.
Deletei would agree it is our carelessness...i am glad we can be paperless in some...i would def miss books.....we need to appreciate the cycle and feed into it...we can work together with nature surely....
ReplyDeleteThanks Brian. We really do need to work together with nature. Better late than never.
DeleteYour suggestion makes sense! Use what is already dying. I'd miss not using paper again even if my own habits have evolved in the past few years.
ReplyDeleteThanks Gabriella. I would miss paper too.
DeleteI so agree, Suzy! If humans used resources sustainably, there would be renewal instead of devastation. But, sadly, humans are greedy. And the legislators want to be elected more than to do the right thing so legislation is lacking. Sigh. Great write!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sherry. So true, we are so greedy. We do things to our convenience. No wonder Mother Nature is so angry with us.
DeleteA powerful message, so cleverly written in two lovely poems!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sherri. Glad you thought so.
DeleteBeautifully and thoughtfully done!
ReplyDeleteThanks Scott. Glad you liked it.
DeleteTotally agree with this Suzy. Let the young trees grow, only use the dying ones. Strong, heartfelt writing, loved it!
ReplyDeleteThanks Lisa. Glad you liked it.
DeleteWonderful poems! I especially liked the second one with the old tree talking - so clever!
ReplyDeleteBlessings!
Thanks Martha. We often forget that even plants have life. I tried to convey that through the talking. Blessings to you too.
DeleteThis feels a bit sad to me--but I do think you really accomplished the purpose of the prompt well--really well crafted!
ReplyDeleteThanks Audrey. I did wonder if I achieved the purpose of the prompt. Glad you thought I did.
DeleteIts a cycle and if we dont realise it soon well then it is bound to be more than 'vicious'. lovely piece!
ReplyDeleteThanks Akila. Yes if we ignore this for too long, we will upset the balance of life.
Delete"Nature doesn't make us fall
ReplyDeleteIt's our careless thought and handling" - Favourite lines.
I liked both the poems. Well penned. :)
Thanks Enigmatic Soul. Glad you liked my poems.
DeleteThanks Loredana. Glad you liked it. I thought I would write from the tree's point of view.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeletelet them grow.......a wonderful message this is...
Thanks Sumana.
DeleteWe are careless with our environment, only thinking of today and not of what chaos we will leave to our children, their children and so on.
ReplyDeleteOne day when we have stripped the Earth of its resources (and the lights go out)- we will mourn its demise in words written on paper...
Anna :o]
Hi Anna - oh lol, hopefully that day will never come.
DeleteNicely done, Suzy! While I enjoyed both, "The Tree" really caught my attention. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteThanks Adam. Looks like The Tree is definitely more popular. Glad you enjoyed my poems and thanks so much for visiting.
Delete